This week I had the pleasure of attending an online book club for a group of women who work with a company that I have worked with for roughly three years.
They had all read POWER, and so I offered a 30minute Q&A session for them to answer any questions about the book, their takeaways, and the writing process.
One of the members asked me, “How has the writing book impacted how you now navigate the world?”
I responded, “I will never again consciously or unconsciously apologise for my existence. I now know with every cell in my body (like never before) that my race and gender are nothing to apologise for.”
In POWER, I share what it is to live and lead without apology;
• I learnt how to make myself small by not sharing my opinions, for fear of not being liked, because we are led to believe that being picked is our most important value.
• I learnt to pretend I didn’t have needs and wants because I didn’t want to be told I was needy or difficult.
• I learnt how to be a ‘good girl’, to only do what was expected of me and toe the line.
• I learnt how to apologise when speaking; diminishing the power of my words by smiling or giggling ‘to soften my meaning’ or my voice, or by actually apologising before I told: ‘I’m sorry to say this, but . . .’
• I learnt how to deny my leadership capabilities because my mind was fraught with the possibility of judgement and failure.
• I learnt how to live ‘as an apology’ as a black woman navigating predominantly white spaces.
This was my version of living and leading as an apology.
In contrast, what does living and leading without apology look like?
• It means that we take up space without apology.
• It means that we communicate our needs because we are worthy of having our needs met.
• It means we operate in the world as full expressions of ourselves, creating our unique paths.
• It means we own our opinions and voices, without diminishment or apology.
• It means that if we want leadership, we can step into leadership knowing that judgement and failure are part of the deal.
• It means that if we are called to leadership, we don’t assume we are not good enough. We understand we will learn as we go.
• It means that we stand proud in our racial identity and ethnicity, and support others to do the same.
So, this is the theme of this month’s three questions:
1. In what area of your life do you consciously or unconsciously apologise?
2. What is the impact on you?
3. What one action would lead you to building your POWER in this area?
May you give yourself the space and time to answer these questions; presence, ownership, and responsibility are powerful.
Wishing you a weekend of building your POWER, without apology.
Thank you if you have already left a review for POWER; I sincerely appreciate the time you took.
If you have already read POWER or are currently reading it, can you please leave a rating and review where you purchased the book.
It doesn’t have to be more than a sentence (though 200 words are gold), but written reviews significantly impact how many women are exposed to the book and its message.
To make it easy for you, if you are someone who never leaves reviews or struggles with what to write, here are some guiding questions:
1. What is your biggest takeaway from reading POWER?
2. Which Power Principle or chapter resonated with you the most and why?
3. How has the book impacted your sense of power in the world?
4. Would you recommend this book to other women?
Goodreads Review (if you bought POWER at a bricks and mortar bookstore)
If you could do this in the next 48 hours, that would be wonderful. I thank you in advance.
And if you don’t have your copy yet ORDER NOW.
Life is too short not to own your POWER!
POWER is available to purchase.
I thank you in advance for supporting my work and my words.